I just really wanted to show you these...

See my tiny girl right there?


Some people have a gift.


My friend, Kristine (LuckyLimePhotography), shared hers with me, and now we have this beautiful part of our lives captured forever.

It still amazes me that my body did that.

And I can't wait/could wait forever/but mostly can't wait to do it again.

But I'm still pretty okay with waiting.

Maybe you know what I mean.

No, that's not just the photography.

He really is that good looking.


And, I'm still okay with waiting...for now.

Coulda. Shoulda.

I am not always sure these days what goes on my

Could Be Doing List

as opposed to my

Should Be Doing List.

It's tricky.

But rest assured.

I am ALWAYS DOING.

Sleep is viewed, foolishly, as an option.

WHY? WHY? WHY?

My day is full of prioritizing and re-prioritizing because what I thought an hour ago was a "had-to-be-done-thing" didn't actually get done. But that was then and this is now, and it's no longer the thing that has to be done. Except it does. Only not as much. Not as much need-to-be-done. (And that line can only be properly voiced if you have inserted the Brian Reagan skit about Cherry and Grape Favorites, keeping the tone and changing the words. Not important. Moving on.)

The point is, it's tricky.

All this juggling.

But sometimes, it's not. Because sometimes there is only one ball to juggle. And you named her Grace. Because Grace means strong, (and a million other things) and that's what she is. Your strength (and a million other things.)

And sometimes you pick her up from her Aunt's house because Daddy was at the dentist. And

the minute you see her, you know all she needs is a nap.

So you take her home. And love her up. And swaddle her like a tiny mummy because that's how she likes it. And you kiss her ears and nose and mouth and cheeks and head.

And then do it once more just for love.

And lay her in her tiny bed.

To sleep.

Because that's what she needs.

And then.

She screams.

A desperate yell.

You rush to her.

Pick her up.

And she immediately drops off to sleep.

Right there in your arms.

And a smile crosses your lips.
And a sigh rests your soul.

Because your Grace didn't just need a nap.

She needed to be Home.

And YOU are her Home.

And the privilege of being that tiny girl's Home fills you with gratitude (and a million other things).

So you sleep.

Together.

This time,

it's not an option.

And the Could Be Doing, and Should Be Doing Lists are perfectly clear.

You could be, and you should be, and you are

Home.

I. As in Me.

Yep.

I am still here.

But when I think about that I--- I realize how much it's changed.

That I has been stretched, molded, expanded, grown, and loved.

And that I teaches school, so that I has probably been hated for at least a few minutes, too.

But that I has a way of winning 'em over, so it's likely they were very short minutes.

Hopefully.

I sit here though---as this changed I---trying to conjure up something meaningful to say but the truth is, I'm worn out. All my creative energy has been used up today. But I had it this morning and it was used up on good good people. So I think that it's okay that it's used up.

One of those good people did get pretty mad at me today.

10 year olds aren't always reasonable---but lots of times they are, so I don't hold it against them. Usually. Besides teaching is good practice for mom-ing. Nothing like the real game, but remarkably good practice just the same.

Being a mom makes me love other kids more, too. It does.

I love them all more.

Because I know that some other mom like me is loving her kid, hoping the grown-ups that spend the day with the kid love her, too.

I'm the other grown up---And---I'm the other mom.

So I love those kids more.

For their moms. For me.

I didn't decide to.

It just happened.

Sometimes it's hard.

Working away from home.

It wasn't what I pictured doing, exactly.

At all.

But I'm sustained.

Just as I was promised in my heart I would be if I did this hard thing.

And you know what, I am happy.

Really.

Really I am happy.

And I am Really Happy.

I wasn't expecting that.

Also,

I am In Love.

With her.

And with him.

So maybe that's why I am happy. Really happy. Because when the day is done. They are mine. Still.

And even with all the change, the new I belongs.

She fits.

With them.

So----if your curious. Here she is.

And yes, that is my ultra-cool mom voice.