All This Spare Time

Some of the ones I love most.

Teaching takes up a whole lot of time, but frankly, for the first time since I started teaching AT ALL whether it was in my major or in my career, I have time to do things BESIDES write lesson plans or panic because the lesson plans still aren't written.


It's glorious.


GLORIOUS.


So what do I do with all this ample spare time? Well the first thing I do is let you know that "ample" is a gross exaggeration, but let's think of the glass as half full. We'll say ample.


The other thing I do is love people.


I love Paul. We go on walks and talk about the future and our game plan and instill in each other the confidence necessary to move the mountains in front of us. And we admire, without ANY reservation, how dang cute our Lovey-girl is.



I love Grace. We go on walks too, and freeze our cheeks and look at the sky. Then we dance to some more Broadway tunes and she doesn't mind that my voice isn't quite as good as the one on the radio. But by golly, I sing my heart out for that kid. And we try more new foods. Like green beans. Grace has a low tolerance for green beans. The first 6 bites were good. Then she did this shuttery gag thing which I interpreted as meaning that she was done. In short. She liked them for 6 bites and then she hated them. And that seems like a normal way to handle a new food, even for a grown-up.



I love my mom. I call her. A lot. For like 12 minute intervals. And we talk about her and we talk about me and we talk about being moms and being teachers and being friends. And then we tell each other that we better go because it's time to go love someone else. 12 minutes seems to be the perfect amount of time. As long as there are TONS of 12 minute chunks.



I love my sisters. I call them, or visit. And we laugh. And we cry. And we talk about how to be better moms and better wives and why we love our children and our husbands. And we confess our mistakes and our fears and take solace in the fact that we aren't the only ones making those same mistakes or battling those same fears. We take care of each other. And that's really saying something because technically, my sisters are sisters-in-law with their very own "real" sisters but they claim me anyway and it means the world to me.



And I love my friends. My other sisters. The giants of women in my life. Who I will sit next to on rocking chairs one day, and we'll laugh, and we'll cry, and we'll remember, and we'll glory in the gift that we are to each other.



And somehow the lesson plans get done, too.



But only AFTER I flirt with Paul.


Shamelessly.

A Candid Look at the Last 20 Minutes

8:56 Grace was pretty mad a second ago. Not sure if that little lovey is going to sleep yet. I think she may be hungry still. That or her teeth hurt. Teething is the pits.

Tangent: So in spite of Wednesday night---you know the one where Paul found me in the fetal postion on an unmade bed with tears running down my cheeks and a baby yelling from her crib, you know, THAT Wednesday night, so inspite of THAT---Thursday night was perfect. The house was picked up, my classroom was put back together, I was a loving wife, a playful mom, Paul was home, and Grace slept all night. It was SO nice after Wednesday's fiasco.

8:57 She's still not sleeping. I think she wants more food. And maybe some Tylenol. It could be a long evening. Hang on.

9:04 I am back. She ate more and had some Ora-gel. She's still fussing. Sad face.

Tangent: I swear, when I put her down and she has her little fusses, my ears go on super-human decibel detection. I can hear the beginning of a fuss before she's even convinced herself that she wants to fuss. I am not sure what's wrong tonight (teeth?), but nights like this where I put her to bed multiple times are frustrating. And to be honest, I think her ears go on super human decibel detection too. And she picks up on EVERY sound that might indicate that SOMEONE SOMEWHERE is going to get her up.

9:05 Wait. Hold it. She stopped fussing.

9:06 This very moment I am pushing off hope that she is down for the night because---I have learned the hard way---Hope wakes her up too.

Tangent: She did however, love sweet potatoes, gnawing on celery sticks, and painting with apple sauce earlier this evening. I entertained us both by singing random Broadway Hits that played on Pandora. I think she likes it when I sing. That's the stuff that made tonight (Friday) perfect. That and how she smiles SUPER huge in the bathtub. And how there's nothing more precious than a tiny naked baby splashing in the tub. Really. There isn't.

9:08 It's getting harder to push off the hope that she is down for the night.

Tangent: It's not that I don't want her awake to play with, it's just that when she is supposed to go to bed and she doesn't, I know it's the beginning of a long night. And truthfully, some of those nights have some very wonderful memories attached to them (like a baby coping with her cold by licking her Mama's chin and her mama laughing so hard that tears fall) but really, the mama finds herself getting more and more desperate for sleep and the next day, it's the daddy who seems to hear the most about the lack of sleep. Ummm...Sorry about that Lover.

9:10 She's out. Let's see how long this lasts.

Tangent: Lately, I have become and expert at the art of being REALLY QUIET. So that the sleeping baby stays asleep. I swore I would raise babies who slept in spite of noise. I read all those books. Well. I lied. Some battles, at the end of the day, aren't worth fighting. Mainly because it's the end of the day. And I am WAY too tired. Plus, with Super Human Noise Hearing Girl just two walls away, I am bound to lose anyway.

So I am just quiet.

9:16 Good night Tiny Girl.