5 weeks old A whole lot of very little has been happening lately.
And by that I mean that all of my time is completely engrossed in a very small array of tasks.
And by that I mean that all of my time is completely engrossed in a very small array of tasks.
Feeding, changing, and sleeping a tiny baby.
Picking up the house, grocery shopping (occasionally), and checking up on the little rugrats that are currently running my classroom (which is relatively unharmed, mostly tidy, obviously busy with projects I designed (or stole from my dear friend Jessie) but smells like a different teacher.)
That's all I do these days.
OH!!!!
And sometimes I cook.
Sometimes.
(Sometimes I just wait for Paul to get home because that's the way we roll around here.)
Don't worry.
My lack-of-"wifely-perfection"-in-that-I-have-little-to-no-interest-in-preparing-food-but-NO-TROUBLE-eating-it has been thoroughly discussed with my doting husband.
He was well aware of my folly BEFORE he married me and to boot,
he LOVES cooking.
So this is a perfect arrangement for us.
In fact in a complete side note from the original intent of this post, when I "help Paul cook" I usually just do dishes.
He does what he's good at
and I do what I am good at.
Like I said.
Perfection.
The tiny girl is marvelous.
We have battled many battles both emotional and physical and the score as of today....
Trials - 4
Herricks - 5
So Boo-yah.
Reading one of my favorite blogs (cjane) the other day, she mentioned how loving your children can border on insanity.
Yes.
There is an ever present knowledge of the frailty of life when you have something that just the thought of losing leaves you with a weak stomach, a shortness of breath, a faint paralysis of limb.
I have so much to lose.
So much.
And it fills me with the most profound gratitude and humility,
and deep down,
horrific fear.
Fear of all the what-ifs, and could possiblies, and I-have-no-control-over-thats.
Fear that can only be met with faith.
That my sweet angel and her practically perfect daddy are mine forever.
And with that thought---and it is no "mere" thought, it is a thought that can only be believed when great spiritual work has been attended to---I go on feeding, changing, sleeping, cleaning, shopping, teaching, cooking (occasionally) and LOVING.
LOVING those two (and the many other magnificent people that I adore--if you think you're on that list, you probably are...if you think you MIGHT be on that list, you probably are)
with all that I have; trying to be more kind, more patient, more...everything that is good and better than who I am right now.
And thrilling more and more at the thought of collecting a few more tiny girls and boys.
